Thursday, February 25, 2010

Dear Ori,

My sweet, neediest, most aggressive, genuine, velociraptor baby - Mommy loves you very much, and is all about the extended breastfeeding. It's not because I'm attached to breastfeeding it's more so because the idea of ripping something away you are so attached to - especially when that thing is not just 100% perfect human nutrition, but is also part of me - some may argue the very essence of "mommy" in infancy - makes me cringe. So, having someone that is almost as tall as me attached to me on a constant basis seems much more "worth it" ... most of the time. Now I get it, you're new so maybe you don't understand how this works... maybe they didn't give you all the instructions on your very long, grueling, painful, way out. You see, sweet child, you are over a year old now.  That means that mommy and her boobies are no longer your only source of nutrition. Now that you are growing into such a big special boy real food is supposed to be your main source of nutrition and the booby? Well, that's just supposed to be a supplement. I've given you time to adjust, and yes the boob is much more convenient... it's obvious that the boob isn't filling you up anymore, which is why you seem to want it every five minutes.
At least I hope that's why... I tend to imagine all of my lovely children plot against me but I would like to think that it was not actually the case.

On a similar note, when mommy sits down it is NOT an invitation to come get some booby... or should I say come wrestle me and demand a booby. Usually if I'm sitting down it's because I'm trying to do school work, and lets face it, it's difficult to type with a little man standing on his head in ones lap while he's trying to figure out how to get your shirt off. Now I understand that you've been teething but seriously? Mommy has been working for a long time now to get the house clean and has managed to keep it that way until now. Thanks for that by the way. You are not the only thing mommy has to take care of.

And seriously?!?
You have your own bed.
There is no reason for you to sleep with me unless I want you to, so I can get more sleep, or step on toys, or take a nap... or whatever.
When I spend forever feeding you so you can fall asleep on the booby (something that your siblings either never did or were done with before they were your age btw), you should not intentionally decide not to stay asleep when I put you in you big boy bed. That Sir, is annoying and drives mommy to the brinks of her sanity... mommy is a busy mommy and that interferes with progress. At this point in our relationship mommy should be free to sleep with daddy alone in bed and naked if she wants to with out the fear of tiny feet in her mommy parts. We live in Florida. It's hot. Sleeping in pants sucks.
Furthermore, you are what like 15 months old now? Don't you think it's time to... I don't know, sleep more than 1 1/2 - 2 hours? You know, that's how little babies sleep... are you a little baby or a big boy?
Okay so maybe that as harsh, but it's hard for mommy to be nice on over a year of no sleep. The lack of sleep and your pushiness has spurred crazy ideas like mommy just taking off for a week so you'll be done with the boob... and I know you don't want that. But seriously, how much longer do you think mommy can go with out killing people? Now we can compromise. If you want I'd totally be down with one middle of the night feeding... that's what Teijah did until he decided he was done with the booby at around 16 months. That was great it allotted mommy time to be a grown up and maybe go to a bar with Bri Bri - or at least the opportunity to SLEEP. Pushiness, btw is unattractive, especially the agressive "no I'm the alpha male" kind you seem to love. Just fyi when that sort of thing presents in men mommy tend to run away as fast as she can... and yes it would even make Edward unappealing. So I suggest you end it now before you like girls... or boys... or whatever.
Ah, I'm glad we could have this little one sided talk.
 I hope you'll take it into consideration next time you go all velociraptor and pull my pants down trying to make me do what you want.
kthanks.♥ ~ mommy


{Kimber} said...

I don't know how you do it!!
I tried...I really did and I failed :(

Charisse said...

This??? I Love. I breastfed Lorelli until she was almost two. It was rough. But...we did it. It was not alll the time. She gave that up at 14-15 months. But there was definitely night feedings, and oftentimes...morning feedings. I feel your pain. But it was two years ago...


Blog Widget by LinkWithin